Sunday, 18 September 2016

Students remember your essence, not your knowledge.

I had the experience of being a Teacher this Summer and in turn, my students taught me.
While standing at the front of the class, drilling grammar rules, I realised that what I said and what I taught would not (always 😄) be remembered. The way I made them feel however, would be.
I was given a position of influence to develop attitudes and to shape perspectives. The opportunity to instill an enduring sense of empowerment and self belief, (besides grammar), was a rewarding experience.
Proverbs 22:6 “Start children off on the way they should go, and even when they are old they will not turn from it.”

Thursday, 15 September 2016

Psychology: Suffering for Success. How Pain Evokes Resilience.

Hardship is an inevitable aspect of life. This is why our attitude amidst hardship is integral to how we are ultimately defined.

'Success' is merely the end product of a consistently healthy attitude towards challenges. Without difficulty how can we develop the strength needed to tackle obstacles? And without failure how can we learn and overcome our limitations?

Picture the view from the summit of a mountain. It is breathtaking, the epitomized symbol of success. It is also merely a fragment of the climbers journey. The witnessed beauty is equally the product of endurance through immense physical pain, psychological barriers and emotional distress. The climbers prior struggle's were essential for building the muscle necessary for such an endeavour. It encapsulates the successful attitude that pain is only a temporary stepping stone.

A stepping stone towards the elation that comes from reaching the summit.

Monday, 31 August 2015

Social Media is Ruining your Future.

It is half 2 in the morning and I am wide awake. Whether that's because of my jet lag or because the buzz of social media has given me insomnia, I do not know. What I do know however, is that social media has come to be a strong touchstone for inscribing memories throughout my life. I've even researched that scientists have discovered that social media has the power to corrupt our memories by replacing them with the images we observe sentimentally, on our laptop/phone screens.
  Over the past year my use of Facebook has escalated and I can't help but feel it has become an unhealthy addiction and form of procrastination. Its depressing to think that for all the hours I've spent on Facebook during my lifetime; I could have applied that time productively, enhancing my skills and actually going outside more to socialize. It's a little early in the year for resolutions but I, and you too, should commit yourself to not only avoiding routinely scrolling through your news feed, tweets and whatever your smartphone app is claiming all your attention, to living in the present AND future.
  My focus and my discipline has been damaged by social media. Studying English Literature at degree level is by far a subject that requires your utmost, undying and focused attention, as their is so much you have to learn, to process and meanings to decipher. It's difficult. Scrolling mindlessly through Facebook is an easy escape from the hardship that is study, and admittedly, it plays with your fomo (fear of missing out). Because all students are having fun all day, seven days a week right? Reality - they are stuck in a social media rut too.
How can you channel your energy into your goals when you are more concerned with that notification? Determination and ambition are qualities I strongly value but lately they have waned. In 10 years will I remember that retweet? Or that instagram post? Probably not.
Long term happiness and goals are much deeper than short term impulses. It's important to centre your thoughts, and really really, its okay to step away from the screens... Be less concerned about the buzz on social media, it's an illusion, a virtual world where you can't build your future.
   Overuse of social media has been linked with narcissistic tendencies. In recent years it has become less about connecting with friends and family, but rather come to be a social parade. Where people flaunt images that present their lives in a very honey coated kind of way...(notice how everyone posts their highlights rather than the gritty bits in between). Do you see many people posting images of themselves reading? Studying? Cooking? Cleaning? I know I haven't. And it doesn't mean it doesn't happen behind the scenes... Of course it does, hard work is done behind the glittering facade of Facebook, but ultimately only by those who aren't influenced into feeling that they should be having fun, right here, right now, 24/7. Some of the strongest people are those that aren't afraid of embracing the mundane, low key aspects of order to attain something great in the future, following a set path, even if it is difficult. If you know what you want, don't expect Instagram or a facebook update to give it you. Put your phone down, and go after it. ❤
Yours sincerely,
Restless, jetlagged, 19 year old, English Lit student.

Saturday, 6 September 2014

The Motivation to Keep Going.

Everyone will struggle in life. It's a fact. It's human nature. And as a writer I think that a struggle that arises, as subtle as it is, is to be persistent about writing. Writing your blog, your book, your articles... whatever it is, a freelance writer has to be their own boss, set their own deadlines and stick to it. When you have a passion for something it is important not to let that fire fade (cheesy line, I know), remind yourself each day how it is meaningful to you. This can be applied to any hobby/career, not just writing.
For instance I really love ballet dancing, but as a student I found the intermediate ballet classes in my area rather expensive! That is not a barrier though, where there's a will there's a way, and there's no stopping you from becoming as skilled and as flexible as you want to be... solely through perseverence, determination and persistence! Only you can decide what you will be and what you can become. With strong self motivation, it'll set the pattern for the rest of your life when there won't be teachers or parents telling you when, how often or how to do things, set your own goals and follow them and surely, there will be no destination you cannot reach ;)
Keep the faith.

Sunday, 9 February 2014

3 Things only Singles can Celebrate on Valentines day.

Valentines day. The time of year has almost arrived where millions of couples worldwide will be baited into adhering to the commercialized ideal of proving to that special someone that you care. However, as beautiful and anticipating a concept this may appear to couples who are currently in relationships, I guarantee that there are people scrambling to find someone, making dating sites buzz! Cracking from the pressure and turning from the concept that they might possibly be spending Valentine's day alone... There is no doubt that treasuring the love of your life is important, if you've found him/her yet. If you haven't then don't worry! Singles will be benefited in other ways this Valentines...

'You' Time - If this time of year makes you feel a little insecure, then DONT feel that way! Being single can actually make you stronger, independent and more confident as a person, it gives you the opportunity to think and reflect more, something that studies have actually proven to increase intelligence and help inner confidence to blossom. Fact. Make a list of things you love about yourself, look at these qualities and think about all the millions of people out there that would also love these about you. Be happy in that your single out of choice, not because you are unattractive and repulsive to the opposite sex!
No Pressure - You are allowed to be free and selfish! You don't have to go to the shops to buy beautiful gifts in a bid to ensure that you make the day special, that means you are financially better off! If money's no object, then maybe you should go shopping and treat yourself this Valentine's to those boots or that game you've been wanting for ages...

Romance Movies or Rom-Coms - While romantic movies can be cringe worthy for some, to all the soppy souls out there, sometimes watching a heart wrenching romance on Valentine's day may be the perfect thing to help you rethink the qualities that you are looking for in a partner. I'm not telling you to go and watch The Notebook and expect a Ryan Gosling knocking at your door (would be amazing though!), but I am saying that it'd help renew your faith in love. If you have been waiting a while for the right guy, or you've had your heart broken a couple times before, let a romance help kindle some warmth towards the prospect of a future relationship.
Whatever it is that you singles do this Valentine's, do it for you.


Thursday, 6 February 2014

The True Definition of 'Beautiful'.

When I think of someone as 'beautiful', it goes far beyond skin deep. There will always be people that are aesthetically beautiful, it's a global blessing. Women with beautiful slim or curvaceous figures, sparkling doe-like eyes, smiles that melt hearts... all of these aesthetic qualities however, should only be considered as pretty accessories in addition to a warm soul, as that is where the essence of beauty is found. You'll understand what I mean if you've ever met someone, naturally judged them via there appearance, and then surprised you as you got to know them. A cheerful spirit or a loving heart are qualities that make someone appear twice or thrice times more attractive. fact.

Looking happy and healthy is a timeless attraction. What is more beautiful than a healthy, happy face or just someone who looks comfortable and relaxed in their own skin? As simplistic as these qualities maybe, they form the basis of all strong relationships, and should not be underrated! I feel as though society today places too much emphasis on the physical and the aspiration to become 'perfect'.

Sometimes competitive fashionista's or make up fanatics can be a little obnoxious, and although I feel that it is a great way through which to express creativity and individuality, when used to an excess, it can be suffocating. Coating the beauty and personality that exists beneath it, and becoming dependent on material things to shape an artificial version. As much as I love fashion and make up for the diversity it provides...when depended upon too heavily and sought to boost happiness, it can break you rather than 'make' you. Love the bare faced, fashionless you first, then accessorize.

Wednesday, 5 February 2014

My Sister's 'Big Chop' Hair Inspiration

After hours of enthusiastically sifting through 'Big Chop' photo's - Before and After's of women going from having long dead, bone-dry relaxed hair, to lustrous curly fro's, my sister was nothing short of inspired to take on a pair of giant scissors and chop chop chop! She certainly cut away over half of her hairs initial length, but decided against cutting her hair down to stubble, in spite of her impulse to cut down to the new growth .
I admire her bravery for committing so massively to her hairs health, going so far as to cut off ALOT of her relaxed hair in a bid to stop breakage between the natural and processed hair. I know I would find it very difficult to part with my locks. 'I plan to cut my hair really short for next college term' she told me defiantly while braiding her fro into a protective style. I admire her ignorance towards those in society who wouldn't understand the goodness, beauty and health benefits that arise from mixed/black girls who do 'the big chop'. Natural will always be beautiful to me.
So far my sister has had some healthy looking new growth and her au naturelle future is looking wonderfully promising!
As much as I love to see a Big Chop in progression, I could never take on this enormous, waiting waiting feat myself. Even though the ends of my mostly relaxed hair may be dry, I am lucky in that my hair grows about 2 inches a month and I am determined to pamper each strand back to health using some gloriously rich natural products like Coconut and Argan oils that my hair soaks up appreciatively. I need to ditch the heat products to embrace the wild curly mass I was born with.